significant word ?

Last two days ago, I went to a camp organized by Hope church. At first I was lazy to go and it is expensive too just for two days and one night. Moreover, I want to go out with my friends to Raja Uda to try the famous and delicious tomyam. Anyway, I took the decision to go too to the camp.

At that night during the praise and worship moment, I thank God that I went to the camp because I felt so refresh after preparing my heart to worship Him. The most precious thing is I felt His presence. The speaker is Pastor Dennis and the sharing which includes his testimonies is worth listening. It was never bored and I listen so attentively. Praise God for that.

We also have a workshop about spiritual gift conducted by Sister Amelia. The result of the test was my primary spiritual gift is faith and I was surprised by that. I told my faith is not that high. The second was mercy/ compassion and giving encouragement. I think that is acceptable. The third is discernment and distinguish spirit. I am not sure about that. At least, I know something new about myself now.

Pastor Zechariah also shares a sermon about coming out of our struggle. The point is being ready to wrestle with God on our own as Jacob did. The second point is be prepared to move from struggling to surrendering which not just letting go but also accepting whatever that God tell us. Lastly, we need to be willing to endure to the end. Be determined like Jacob.

The most significant words from God is from Pastor Dennis’s sharing.

~ Matthew 26:39~ if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me, not my will but Your will. Jesus is referring that let God’s will be done and not our will.

I do not know why this is significant to me but I felt God’s presence strongly as I heard this words. It was as if God is speaking these words to me. I need to take note of that. Another thing is I heard from Sister Pei San’s prophesy last month about seeing a lock that is unlocked in my heart. I really do not know what that refers to. But could it be the spiritual gift in me that should be unlocked to be use in the kingdom of God?  Maybe yes and maybe no, because I cant find anyone to interpret that accurately for me.

I came back earlier before the camp ended on Monday because I have two presentations and my class starts at 8am. I have done my presentation now and it went smoothly. Thanks God for that! Yeah! Now, I can focus on other assignments. My Individual Oral Presentation was about love language and it was examined by Mr Neoh. That Mun Hoe asked a lot of Q and even talk against my point but it went alright in the end. Pheww~~ 

reminder of a rainbow

This evening when I travel back from home to hostel, I experienced something. Yesterday and today when I travel along the highway, I saw the same thing. It was a rainbow. It was beautiful. I really admired God’s creation. It was amazing. Rainbow also symbolizes hope. I learnt this from camp cam. It is a new hope that God has promised us as His beloved child.

My mind was driven to somewhere else when I see the sky. When I saw my brother with his fiancé, it reminded me of a happy future family with baby whom will be my nephew and niece. My thought was focused on the babies. I was imagining myself playing with them, having fun and teaching them about stuff. It gives me a new hope in life. I felt meaningful to live on and see the future even though I was imagining myself to be single at that time. When I thought of the children, I told myself, if I really have to be single. I still have hope to live on with laughter of my nephew and nieces.

The sky really makes me calm as I look into it. It was coloured by the rainbow too. Thanks God for giving me this hope. Of course I hope to have a life partner that can love me unconditionally. But everything I surrender to God and let He decides what will be my future. It will be tiring if I still waiting for a mr right. Why don’t I just live to the fullest with the people around me while God send the one to me? Haha. It is just a positive thinking.

Thank you Father that You are so merciful to me as You think of me and send the beautiful hope to remind me of Your goodness. Even though I might not know Your plan, but I will trust in You because You have promise Abraham to give his descendant an abundant life. may Your word come to pass and let Your plan be fulfill through me. Bless my family and protect them from any danger. Father, let Your love shower them daily and let them know how great is Your love to them.

guard our heart

It has been so long since I write again. I have no idea why but I don’t have much story to share compare the old me. Now, I prefer to read people inspiring story or listen to people sharing. What have changed me? That makes me curious but thanks God, I slowly getting back to myself. Can talk to people even though we alone. But still not that loud as last time where people will call me one of the loudest.

Yesterday, I listen to a few friends sharing about their relationship with friends. I am glad that I can listen to them and pray for them. Before our conversation start, I was praying that I can be a blessing to others and know what to pray for them. And God make my wish come true. It was amazing. Ask and it will be given to you.

Then, today, I read a blog about relationship between girl and guy. It actually connects to the sharing I heard yesterday. I agree with what my friend share at her blog. If we do not have any feeling towards the opposite sex, then, we should not do things or say things that will lead them on a misunderstanding. It true right? I really dislike guy that make that kind of misunderstanding. They should know the boundaries and never cross it because girl’s heart is very fragile and sensitive. My friend told me before of her sharing and it hurt her and it hurt me as well.

Anyway, maybe this is hard to control. That why, we should always guard our heart and never give to anyone. Only God can safeguard our heart and never let it bleed.

Dear Father, I give my heart to You, may You protect it from any harm and only surrender it to the one that You think is ready to love me like how You have love me. Lead me and guide me to never hurt anyone and bless me with wisdom and patience to trust in You forever that You will provide. My Jesus, my Provider ~